Know Your Place.

     
 
zen.jpgI would like to use this opportunity to say to all my followers, readers that the no-nonsense-non-tolerant-always-speak-the-truth Mimi is back. Of course my writing went a bit further than I planned so I had to shorten my thoughts and censor it BUT dirty-minded-can’t-be-arsed-Miseducator Mimi is back!
I have been through a lot, like A LOT, mentally in the last few months and for a while now I have had to end/cut relationships/friendships/family ties that meant the world to me but ultimately were hurting me no matter how much I didn’t want to admit it- they were. Anyone knows that I like to use my experiences or a friend’s or just a stranger’s to help miseducate so people don’t end up in misery like any of us did. This is what I have always wanted for anyone in the world, to always be a beacon of hope.
Now this is important, if maybe I understood this I wouldn’t have been in misery, YOU KNOW YOUR PLACE in someone’s life you consider dear to you because three quarter of the time, how important you think someone is to you is not how they see you and THAT’S where the pain starts from… but least you know the problem and can solve it or worse, move on.
It’s important that as a girlfriend, friend, shag buddy, acquaintance you know your place; listen to your instincts, it’s one of your MOST important assets you have that can save you a lot of stress. I’m naturally a paranoid person which in turn doesn't allow me to trust easily and cause of that I will never put myself in a situation I can’t walk away from because of fear of disappointment- sad but true. Maybe I have been hurt a lot in the past so I try not to attach myself to situations that will ultimately lead to my demise. Its so important, look around your social circle, who you are dating, who you consider your "ride and die" and ask yourself- I’m I getting what I want out of this relationship? Is the love, attention, and affection being reciprocated? Do I give more than I receive? It’s not necessarily about giving and wanting to receive because you’ve been giving but ultimately we are humans and we want some form of appreciation and acknowledgement.
Sometimes you need to know your place in someone’s life because you might get hurt if you expect too much.
I’ve never understood when people say “I’m in a relationship but its complicated”… There is no in between, its either you are in or you are out. If you find yourself in a relationship where you are cheating and its not just to tell your niggas or yourself at night- “I smashed that” or to ease your sexual urges as a woman- there is no point being in that relationship. I am not condoning cheating but who I’m I to judge. When you start looking for something outside of your relationship then its over, something you feel completes you- its over, some feeling you aren’t getting that feeds your esteem- over. It’s either 1. Look for how to balance what you aren’t getting in that relationship or leave and find someone who can give you that huge part in a relationship you are missing- KNOW YOUR PLACE- “do I want to be in this relationship?” or “will I be happier?”, “is this the place for me”? and let that person you are with KNOW THEIR OWN PLACE as well.
Sometimes you will be helping the one you love by setting them free- that is the GREATEST sign of love to me, seeing above your needs to make another happy.
As humans we can be selfish, a good friend of mine said something that really got me thinking. She said to me- “Mimi, you always put others hurt, pain and needs before your own, you always make time even when you are hurting the most but if you don’t fix your own problems/yourself, how can you ever be fully there for the people you do love?”Honestly, once I heard those words, I decided it was time to be selfish. It was time for me to put my foot down and say I am unhappy, it was time for me to say I don’t like being treated or spoken to like this, it was time for me to stop walking around egg shells and be the best I can be for myself for me before others. Sometimes its ok to be selfish. Sometimes its ok to focus on JUST yourself and honestly if your loved one doesn’t understand? Then they aren’t meant to be in your life.
Once you know your place and its not where you thought or the location makes you unhappy- move. You too, yes you reading this deserve to be happy, stop giving a rat’s ass about people’s feelings, do you AND BE HAPPY. You will meet people who will care so much about you its choking, people who will never want to see you hurt and if they know they had an ounce of contribution to your hurt, they will drop their pride, move heaven and earth till you are happy again.
Please there is no amount of sex, head, 69, whatever "freakyness" you like that should allow you take any form of rubbish and allow you to be “comfortable” in a “place” you didn’t think you would ever be or not want to be. There will be good sex again and if there isn’t teach the person until they know how to please you.
Do this for you, find that PLACE that makes you happy and enjoy it, know your place and know your center, find your peace… life is too short to settle for any less. Let go of anything that is holding you back from peace. Be happy.

Original post culled from http://miseducationofmimi.blogspot.com/2014/09/know-your-place.html