Greetings Mortals,
So I had this friend, she wasn’t always my friend, I referred to her as a b-i-t-c-h back then.
You see the thing about this bitch was that she was dating a friend of a friend and I considered him to also be a grumpy bitch; the best thing that happened to them both was… breaking up.
You see, he brought out the absolute worse in her, when they broke up, I saw the best in her and she became my friend and I equally became close to the guy. I had never believed that someone could actually bring out the bad in you, a nasty, negative, pessimistic you and it shows to the world. They both got married and as they both acknowledge now- they are happier apart.
The truth is that who you surround yourself with can either bring out the good in you or the useless in you. I had a friend once, very close to me and around him there were no inhibitions, nothing was bad or forbidden, my sense of right or wrong went away. His friendship scared me because I always said things I didn’t mean around him. He was dangerous and it brought out the danger in me, the ever meticulous Mimi, I liked it and hated it. We had to end and are happier apart, I think.
First thing you need to understand before entering ANY kind of relationship, not just a love kind but friendship, work relationship, collaboration is-  your worth. People TRULY don’t understand the importance of knowing and UNDERSTANDING self-worth, not just in your person but in your work, if you don’t, how could you identify when you are being played, sidetracked, treated like crap? And most importantly not changing the REAL you. If you know and understand who you are, if you truly get it not just know it but GET it- no one can bring out the bad in you.
I am not even trying to be soppy and mushy but a topic like this can save lives and a LOT of anguish as well.
There are signs to know when someone is turning you into a person you don’t know anymore-
  • Not liking what you see in the mirror;
  • When you leave the person, you feel a sense of relief;
  • You never know when the next fight is coming, but you know it’s around the corner;
  • You don’t feel good about yourself;
  • You don’t want to be around the person but someone you feel you NEED to be around this person;
  • You don’t feel at peace;
  • The cons out way the pros;
  •  This person doesn’t significantly add to you.
      You see your friend happy and you remember her/him being the saddest person ever and you then understand and know the power of love. You understand that the RIGHT kind of love only helps you grow and ultimately brings out the best of you. You know you are kinder, you’re better, you’re loved and most importantly, you matter.
As a smart friend of mine told me tonight,” are you staying away from someone because it is malice or it is living with wisdom? It may temporarily be good for you but you will wreck your peace”.You need to step away from this relationship that doesn’t bring out the good in you, you need to experience that final straw that would make you walk away and BE happy- it IS possible.
Ok I am not any more mature than I was 2 years ago, or any smarter, I am just knowing and identifying my worth- you need to as well and THAT in itself is bliss you can’t buy.
Remember, the best of you is brought out by the best FOR you.
This has been a public service announcement.


Original post culled from